ADHD; Food Allergies; Seasonal Allergies; and more

I am sitting here trying to decide where to start...I have learned so much info over the last few weeks it is frightening! I guess let me start with my ADHD son's diet...if you read previous blogs you will find out that he has a red dye and gluten allergy. While researching food allergies in general I learned more than I ever wanted to learn! LOL I met another mom who has an autistic son. She changed his whole diet and he has now improved so much that he would be considered a "high functioning autistic". Then my sil and I were discussing some of the changes in the autistic child's diet and she was telling me what she had learned about certain food items. Then I read this book: "Animal Factory". If you get a chance you should read it. It is an intense book about how America's food is being processed and how bad it now is for you. Anyways so after reading that book and everything else I had learned I took a step back and looked at what my family had been eating...It wasn't a pretty sight. I started incorporating more veggies and fruits (organic and local grown) into our diets. I started cutting out processed foods...I am no saint so believe there is still processed foods in my house but I am hoping to convert my family to all whole cooked foods within the next year. This will be particularly hard for them since they seem to be addicted to Mac&Cheese! I am also slowly changing over to local farm meats, antibiotics and hormone free. I also started my kids on probiotics, Fage (which also has probiotics), and vitamins, particularly the Omega 3s. The probiotics replace your good bacteria that any antibiotics will kill. If you ever have to take an antibiotic you should always take a probiotics. Fage is basically an unsweetened yogurt but much better for you than yogurt. I add honey and fruit to it for the kids. I had read lots of research that said Omega 3s are good for ADHD kids (and any child on the spectrum-Autistic, Aspergers, ADD, ADHD, etc). I want to add fish oil, zinc, magnesium, vitamin K supplements at some point since there is also research on these with the spectrum kids. So over the last 2 weeks or so I have changed our diet and I saw that for my ADHD son this has drastically improved his symptoms. He has been sleeping better, hardly any hyperactivity, and better concentration. While his physical symptoms have improved his emotional have become worse. Some of these emotional symptoms I am not even sure he had before...He acts like he has been mortally wounded when anyone touches him. He is suddenly very afraid of things he didn't fear a month or so ago. For instance: at the beginning of summer I had to constantly watch him when we went swimming because he liked to go into the deeper water (even though he couldn't swim very well). Now he is terrified of going into water above his waist-to the point where he won't even do swimming lessons. Even if I hold him and go in the deeper water he freaks out, afraid I will let go of him. As far as I know he hasn't seen any movies/shows with drownings, etc so I am not sure about this change. And it isn't even just the water -it is other things too. These are not symptoms that I have found to be linked to ADHD in any of my readings...I have seen them linked to Aspergers though...So I have started researching Aspergers. I am lucky to have a friend who has an Aspergers son and I can go to him with my questions. My son does not exhibit the necessary requirements to be diagnosed Aspergers. However I think, given that they are all on the "spectrum", just as Aspergers share some of Autistics traits, ADHD can share some of Aspergers traits. I am just wondering why it seems like these symptoms have appeared all the sudden...

Death and Kids

All the Little Things

From “The Rest of Us” by Jacquelyn Mitchard

“We were barely settled after arriving for a week’s visit with friends in Washington, D.C., when it became apparent that their nine-year-old son’s hamster, Hank, was headed for the big aluminum exercise wheel in the sky.

That may sound comic. But the situation actually was pretty grim. Like many modern kids with mobile parents, our friends’ son, Zachery, unable to have a big dog or a furry feline, transferred all that affection seeking to Hank and Nerissa, his pals in the neighboring cage on the laundry-room floor. …kids then laid …Hank…to rest under the big tree where others of his tribe had gone before him.

“This is why I resist getting my kids pets,” I told Gayle, who answered that this was actually part of why she did get them pets. We stood there uncomfortably, watching our children play in the yard. “I just don’t want to be surrounded by things that are so fragile,” I said.

“But you already are,” Gayle said.

She brought a new hamster (Nancy) later that day.

A few days after we’d left, Gayle called to tell me that Zachary began crying hard one night in bed. “It’s Hank, it’s Hank,” he said. “I can’t get over it.” She murmured comforting things, about the good times, about the end of pain. Zach seemed momentarily comforted. Then he began to cry again. What is it? His mother asked. “It’s death, it’s death,” Zachary said. “I can’t get over it.”

I’m with you, kid.”

We have had many family deaths within the last year. My oldest son had experienced the death of his great-grandfather when he was about 5 yrs old. I am not really sure if he remembered that. I don't remember him really asking any questions about it. My middle son was 2 yrs old at the time so he doesn't remember that funeral. But this last year and a half we have had 3 family deaths on my husband's side of the family. The fist death, even though it was the kids' great-grandpop, didn't seem to really faze them. This may be because it was just a memorial service since Pop was cremated. Then in May their great-great grandma died. She was about 100 yrs old and hadn't been herself for a long time. The boys didn't even really know her. But this was an actually funeral with the graveside service also. My middle son was extremely concerned that they were going to put her in this hole in the ground. He didn't understand since he had never witnessed this before, therefore we had not had to explain the burial process. Once I explained that it was just her body that was going into the ground he still was very concerned...it took him the rest of the day to accept it. Even now, he occasionally brings it up. And now we have another funeral to go to- my husband's uncle (the kids great-uncle). This time it is just the memorial service but I am dreading it. I am sure this time my middle son will have lots of questions about why there isn't a body in a casket and why we aren't burying him in a graveyard. I just am not sure how I am going to answer them. 

As I read the above short story from Jacquelyn Mitchard's book it just touched me and I thought I would share it.  

My "Different" child

This short story reminds me of my ADHD child. I hope someone gets some hope/ encouragement from it.

My Son the Warrior

Taken from “The Rest of Us” by Jacquelyn Mitchard

“Until now, we took a fair amount of pride in the fact that we could raise boys we described as sturdy but gently. Boys who could throw straight but also liked to cuddle, and who made guns from their breakfast toast only occasionally, not every day.

Then along out of babyhood came our youngest son, now rounding the curve toward age three, and we have to admit we think this boy is an alien life form.

Martin, who has been raised exactly like his brothers have been raised, sleeps with a plastic scimitar tucked into the band of his training pants. He sidles up to the couch evenings, and with a beseeching look in his almond-shaped brown eyes, says, “Mommy, may you fight me please?” He often carries two swords (spoons will do in a pinch) for this purpose. And so I sit, desultorily whacking away in a moral combat with my toddler, who crows when he lands a direct hit, “You’re dead now, Mommy. Please fall over.”

I know that Martin loves me—after all, he must depend on me to give him food since he is too short to reach the cabinet handles. But when I hear him sing his version of his favorite song, “Ol’ McDonald had no mommy, ee-ay-ee-ay-oh….” I am unsettles. And recently, he performed a Freudian maneuver that was an even greater source of consternation.

We have a children’s wooden crèche next to our Christmas tree, and we had versions of making it work in the style that French families do—you know: The Three Kings (called the “Wise Guys” by our sons) start out a few feet away from the manager and move a little closer every day throughout Advent.

Martin took an interest in the crèche this year, and I noticed immediately that every night at bedtime, Baby Jesus was on the roof of the stable.

“Why is he up there, Marty?” I asked.

“He is hiding from his mommy,” Martin explained with his customary intensity. “She always tells him no, don’t do that. He can’t stand her.”

This, I thought, is an angry young man. And I get further evidence all the time that Martin is the toughest cookie in our jar.

The other night, I was helping him put on his pajamas—an indignity he no longer suffers gladly. Taking pity on his restless cried, I soothed him, “There, there. You’re Mom’s little puppy….”

“No!” he cried. “I’m ling of the wild frontier.”

I suppose it is difficult to be king of the wild frontier and still have someone count out the carrots on your plate. Martin’s nature brings home to me again and again the truth that our sons and daughters are only passing through. At first, they are of you, born to come to your arms. Rapidly, they are with you, pausing only long enough for you to dab a few hurried strokes of paint on the canvas they are becoming—they are on their way to belonging to themselves, and then to the world. If we are lucky, they always will consider our home their harbor, but they are headed out to the open sea, almost from the first.

I sit tonight, looking at Mother Mary, her head softly bowed as she waits inside the stable for her little son to get over his fit of pique and come down from the roof. And I think of thousands of years of mothers of growing children who bowed their heads and hoped for the best, as they wondered, What child is this?”

Homeschooling Year 2

So I finished Year 1 of homeschooling my oldest son (grade 5)...Overall it was a good year. One thing I have learned is that I need to be more organized!! I am one of those people who piles stuff but always knows where something is as long as noone moves my stacks. LOL




We have decided to homeschool all 3 boys this year. My oldest will be in 6th grade, second (ADHD) will be in 2nd grade, and third will be in Kindergarten. This should be an experience! :-)



I wanted to write about my convo with my son's 1st grade teacher. Obviously I won't name her as I don't want to cause any problems...Anyways this woman has been teaching for years. She has been nominated "teacher of the Year" at least once that I know of. She is an absolutely great teacher!! I personally felt that she bypassed the "red tape" and tried to help my son learn by using all sorts of different things. The funny thing was that when I contacted other parents they all said something along the same lines! She is definetely a wonderful teacher. Anyways. I approached her one day toward the end of the year. I told her I had debated on telling her some info but didn't want her to feel that she needed to hide it from administration. I had decided to go ahead and tell her and if she was questioned by administration she could tell them, therefore she wouldn't be caught in the middle. My info: I had decided to homeschool my second son this coming school year. Guess what she told me!!?!?!? She said I had made a good decision - that my teacher choice for this coming year were not the greatest (at least for my son). I was amazed!! I thought that same thing (along with other reason) but never thought she would agree! Doesn't it say something when a public school teacher agrees with a parent that the teacher choices for the next year are not the greatest? Flabbergasted but feeling extremely ...verified...(not sure if thats the word I am looking for but it seems appropriate)

No More Ridalin Treating ADHD without Drugs

If you haven't read "No More Ridalin Treating ADHD without drugs" by Mary Ann Block please do!! It is a fantastic read!!! The funny thing is that I had bought this book 2 years ago when I had issues with my 7yr old  in preschool but I had never read it! The author became a doctor because her daughter was sick and the doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong. It is very interesting. I can not stress the importance of reading this book. There is so much medical info that it takes a little bit to digest. Most of what she talks about I have learned over the last almost 8 years of dealing with my son. We learned he has a red dye sensitivity in Oct 08. We recently learned he has a high gluten sensitivity when I started baking my own bread with high gluten bread flour. He also has bad seasonal allergies and recently developed asthma as a reaction to his seasonal allergies. But the book also talks about how most ADHD kids are vitamin deficiency, particularly Vitamin D and magnisium. Another problem with ADHD kids is low blood glucose...which I had never considered. So my search for a doctor who would be willing to run some vitamin deficiency tests and supervise my suppliments. Our regular pediatric doc refused to do this. Needless to say that will most likely be the last time we see her...So my search continues for a "holistic" doctor (as our pediatic doc said).

ADHD

I also deal with a son who has been diagnosed ADHD. We do not medicate him, instead we use behavior modification. This method has worked over the year very well for us. Let me say I have nothing against medicine...but if it is only being used to "calm" the child down I don't like it. A lot of our schools, even though it is against the law for them to even suggest it, really push meds onto the "disruptive" kids. The parents I know, who have had THE meeting, say they really feel pressured to administer meds to their kids; that they feel ganged-up on. I know a teacher who once told me "if your child had diabetes wouldn't you put him on meds? Your child has ADHD the same should apply- he should be on meds". I really took offense to that comment and totally didn't (and don't) agree with that at all. For one, diabetes is a medical condition you can die from and, as far as I know, ADHD has never killed anyone. A child who has ADHD could die due to some of the symptoms (i.e. impulse control resulting in death, depression resulting in suicide, etc) but the actual diagnosis has not, as far as I know, ever killed a child. And while I really liked this teacher, I would NEVER have allowed her to teach my ADHD son, since it was obvious to me that she already had made up her mind and would not be receptive to behavior modification. That said, putting your child on meds is your choose, not mine. I choose not to...


I really did lots of research on ADHD before my son started school. For him, the problems started in preschool. He was unable to control his impulses and was being threatened to be kicked out of preschool! I was shocked!! The child was 4 yrs old!! Having been a preschool teacher I understood the reasons as to why they would think about dismissing him but also due to that same experience I knew that there was an underlying problem to the situation. Come to find out that he wasn't the only child misbehaving and the underlying problem was that there wasn't enough stimulation being offered to the children. The talks at circle time were much too boring to the children. There were no manipulative, pictures, etc. There was not a constant adult in the room. Needless to say this was my first battle in our journey of ADHD. I fought to make the school changes some of the things they did or didn't do. These changes really helped the class as a whole. He did not get expelled and from the preschool on an upbeat note.

I plan to continue writing about this journey so stay toned...



"Why Gender Matters" by Dr Leonard Sax is a good book to read, particularly if you have boys or tom-girls, or if you have a child labeled as ADHD. If you live near me I know that the Samuels Library has a copy of this book. Dr Sax also has a new book out "Boys Adrift". This is also an interesting book to read.

Virginia Homeschooling regulations

There are 4 options to homeschool in Virginia.

Option I: Home School Statute. Va. Code Ann. § 22.1-254.1. “Home Instruction”
1. Parental instruction of children is an acceptable form of education. Va. Code Ann. § 22.1-254.1(A).

2. Parents must annually notify their local superintendent of their intention to home school by August 15. If moving into the school district or if starting home instruction after the school year has begun, parents must notify “as soon as practicable” and thereafter comply with other requirements within thirty days of notice. There is no requirement to use the local school district’s form.

3. Approval is not required. "Approval is automatic so long as a proper notice is filed." State Supts. Memo No. 105, June 6, 1984. The same is true for families starting after the school year has begun: "...subsequent to providing the school division with a notice of intent, such parents can begin home schooling and they will have 30 days to submit the other information required." Supts. Memo No. 124, June 9, 2006, referring to the legislature's 2006 addition of the word "thereafter" to the notice requirement.

4. Parents must satisfy one of four options: (i) have a high school diploma, or (ii) be a “teacher of qualifications prescribed by the Board of Education,” or (iii) provide a curriculum or program of study, or (iv) provide evidence that the “parent is able to provide an adequate education.” State Supt. Memo 105, June 6, 1984, stated that in determining whether a parent can provide an adequate education, a local superintendent should determine “whether the document itself exhibits a mastery of language by the writer; whether it includes plans for instructional activities; and whether it presents a reasonable scope and sequence of content. The [local] superintendent does not have to approve or disapprove the activities or the content and should not pass judgment on whether the curriculum is a satisfactory substitute for that of the public schools. That should be left to the parent.”

5. Parents must submit a "description of curriculum” which is a list of subjects they intend to teach. Families are not required to describe the content of individual courses.

6. Anyone aggrieved by a superintendent’s decision may appeal within 30 days to an independent hearing officer.


Alternative Statutes Allowing for Home Schools:

Option II: Religious Exemption Statute. “A school board shall excuse from attendance at school any pupil who, together with his parents, by reason of bona fide religious training or belief is conscientiously opposed to attendance at school.” § 22.1-254(B)(1). Homeschoolers may receive an exemption under this statute according to § 22.1-254.1(D). This exempts them from all requirements under the home school law. § 22.1-254 (H)(5).

In Johnson v. Prince William County School Board, 404 S.E.2d 209 (1991), the Virginia Supreme Court agreed with HSLDA’s arguments and ruled that the “sole test is the bona fides of their (a home school family’s) religious beliefs.” The state’s interest in education cannot be considered. The court also held that a family only has to demonstrate religious opposition to attendance at public school, not opposition to the home school statute or private school attendance. In HSLDA’s case, Dusan v. Cumberland Co. School Board (Chancery No. 2102, Cumberland Co. Circuit Court, Judge Snoddy, Sept. 15, 1993), the Court agreed with HSLDA and favorably applied the Johnson case and reversed the board’s denial of the parents’ religious exemption.

Homeschoolers choosing this option, therefore, need to prove: (1) they have sincere beliefs that are (2) religious, not merely philosophical, which (3) demonstrate their objection to attendance in the public schools. Homeschoolers should prepare a letter describing their religious beliefs opposing public school attendance and submit to the school board. Also, homeschoolers should include an affidavit from their pastor (or other religious expert or authority) stating that their beliefs concerning education are religious in nature, and two or three letters from friends who can vouch for their sincerity.

Option III. Certified Tutor Statute:
If a parent is certified in Virginia, he need only provide a one-time notice to the local superintendent that he will be tutoring children (the name of the children who will be tutored should not be included) and verify that he is certified. § 22.1-254(A). Two courts have ruled that homeschool parents can use this option. One was HSLDA’s case, Prince William Co. School Board v. Charles Berlin, No. CH-34982, Prince William Co. Circuit Court, Judge Richard Potter, Nov. 24, 1993. Subsequently, a State Superintendent memo advised all school districts to follow the Berlin ruling.


Option IV. Private or Denominational School:

Groups of homeschoolers can create private schools with each home a part of the campus and each parent a teacher. Private schools are not regulated. § 22.1-254. An individual home school cannot be a private school. § 22.1-254.A. A private school can establish a distance program (or virtual program, or satellite program) where a student is enrolled in and under the authority of the private school, but the student is taught primarily by his parents at home.

 
Standardized Tests:
Only for parents choosing Option I, and only if the child was 6 or older by Sept. 30. By August 1, submit one of the following. Va. Code Ann. § 22.1-254.1(C) 1. Results of any nationally normed standardized achievement test showing the child attained “a composite score in or above the fourth stanine” (i.e., 23rd percentile); or 2. An evaluation letter from a person licensed to teach in any state, or a person with a master’s degree or higher in an academic discipline, having knowledge of the child’s academic progress, stating that the child is achieving an adequate level of educational growth and progress; or 3. A report card or transcript from a community college or college, college distance learning program, or home-education correspondence school; or 4. Another type of “evaluation or assessment which the division superintendent determines to indicate that the child is achieving an adequate level of educational growth and progress.” If you plan to submit an assessment under test option 4, it is strongly recommended that you discuss this with the school system early in the school year.
 
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